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To begin I kind of need to start at the beginning. I have always been a little insecure. I know you are thinking "What, no." But I am here to tell you yes. I had many fears that I was not enough, that people were annoyed with me, that I was ______________. Fill in that blank yourself and I probably felt it. In high school I began to realize that I was worth it, that I was worth something, not nothing. And that happened because I began to understand a fraction of the love that God has for me, the affection that He has for me. And I realized that if God who is perfect, and all powerful, and all knowing loves me, then I must be special. I began to try and see myself the why that he sees me. Not looking at me and thinking, "Ugh I created that, oh Man that is a waste. Or there she goes again." Instead he was thinking, "I love you, please see that you are of worth to me. I made you in my image, I cannot be wrong." I felt in a way that I was breaking his heart by the negative self-talk that I was doing to myself. This is where the change began. Was I cured, no, will I be fully cured, not until I am united with my savoir in heaven.
Then I started university, I realized that my mind was a troubled thing and I needed to go to someone to help sort it out. I went to counseling, GASP. I repeat, Yes I went to counseling. And it was the best decision I have ever made. (Now I truly think this was a great decision, but obviously this is a hyperbole, because I just told someone my Birkenstocks were the the best decision I made, I may use this phrase flippantly, but in all seriousness choosing to have Christ guide my path was the best choice, and I continue to have to make that choice daily.) Anyway. I began to be a lot more respectful to myself. I began to notice that negative talk I was doing, that I didn't even realize I was doing, and replace it with truth. I began to care for myself and I know now that I am worth it and beautiful and loved.
The reason I give this background is that I am pretty good with how I feel about myself. Or so I thought.
In the last week I have had two people, that do not know each other at all, tell me that I look much happier than I have in a while. This brought me to tears and it still does while I write this. It brings me to tears because I thought I was pretty happy before. But this company has helped me to believe in myself, do I still sometimes have the self doubt, of course I do. But it is not going to stop me.
No one ever tells you when you start these businesses that they are going to help your personal growth. They tell you, you will make money, you may impact people's lives, you will have some freedoms financially and with your time. But they do not tell you when you start that you will become a better person. That your aura (for lack of a better word) will radiate a light that people will wonder about. Did I have confidence before, yea I would say that I did. But this is a difference type of confidence. I not only look happier, I am happier, which is a huge statement if you have been reading this blog for any period of time. Last year at this time, I was getting back from a mission trip to Haiti and I was very lost in my path. I had no idea what I should be doing. Read about it here. I believe that God brought about this network marketing company to help me to see myself a little more like how he sees me.
He believes in me, even if I do not, I will tap into his belief because with him I can do immeasurable things.
This opportunity has helped many women who feel as if they are stuck in life, or feel as though they are "only" a mom, which is a huge honor, but for some reason they feel like they need something more, or something to call their own. These "little lipstick companies" have rejuvenated women, which in turn affects their family. Men have been greatly impacted a well!