Don't tell me what I DID!

I had the privilege of attending a very dear friend of mine's weddings yesterday. She was very kind and invited me to partake in some of the events of the wedding weekend that usually only the bridal party or family are invited to. They day did not exactly go as planned, it rained and it was meant to be an outdoor wedding, but it didn't matter. The joy and love that was throughout the entire event was evident to everyone that was there.

I was in charge of the video camera. So basically I called myself the videographer. And I took this seriously. So when it came time to cut the cake and I was about to miss it I rushed over with camera in hand ready to capture the cake in face moment.  I was not too late and got it all on film. I was talking to the mother of the bride this lady comes over and is noticeably distraught. She grabs my arm and proceeded to practically shake her finger at me and scold me as if I were a child. Little did I know that in my rush over the get on camera all the shenanigans I stood in front of someone else that she informed me was family. She also said that I told the person I got in front of to "Get out of my way." When I told her I did not say that. She told me that indeed I did say that. (side note, I love when people tell me what I did, sarcasm) She was so mad, it was startling. I almost thought she was going to smack me or something. The mother of the bride was still standing there and put her arm around her, trying to calm the situation down, and said this is a celebration and the lady told her to back off. Seriously you just told the mother of the bride to back off. I can only imagine that my face is showing a mixture of shock and awe at what I cannot believe is happening to me. After she tried to tell me what I did, I realized there is nothing I can do in this situation but apologize, because she already has it set in her mind that I terribly wronged someone that she loves. So I say, "I am very sorry I did not know that I did that." She says, "Thank you for apologizing," and walks away. The mother of the bride says we need to pray for her, which made me feel a tad better, but I was affected by this turn of events for the next few hours.

It is very hard for me to apologize for something that I know I did not do. I had a serious conflict inside of me. On one side I knew what God wanted me to do, simply apologize. It was truly all she wanted. But then there was this other part of me that wanted to stand my ground because I know that I did not say, "Get out of my way." Anyone who knows me knows I would never say that. I knew I wasn't wrong. And I could not stand having this lady tell ME WHAT I DID. This was a classic example of the sinful part of me and what I wanted to do and my Christian part of me what I should do. Following what I knew God wanted from me deescalated the situation. It was solved in simply a few minutes, if that. If I would have tried to prove myself it would have only made it worse and nothing would have been solved. A huge scene could have been caused and I would have been that girl who is part of a fight at a wedding. Would have made for a great story in a few years but for the immediate time would not have been very flattering.

I do not like how I am now seen in their eyes, I think that is what bothers me the most. Not that my image in tainted but I do strive to be a person that has integrity and what I say I do and I live by certain principles. When someone accuses me of something that goes against who I am and what I am about it affects me. I know that I will probably never see these people again, but for some reason it still affects me even a day later. I know it also should not affect me as much as it does because this lady doesn't know me and the only person that I should care about their perception of me is God. But I am human I feel greatly and I do care what people think of me to a point.  This reminds me of people accusing Jesus of so many things that he didn't do or did do and they twisted it and he never fought back. He knew it wouldn't make a difference. They had their minds made up about him. And I felt the same way with this lady, no matter what I would say it wouldn't matter, she had her mind made up about me.