Big Step

So I took a big step today. It is a step that I needed to take a while ago, but for some reason I procrastinated, well I know the reason and I will get to it in a bit. I finally registered to take a few tests that I need to take to be a certified teacher in Illinois. You may be asking why it has taken me a year to register for these tests. Well I am afraid. As long as I can remember I have never been very good at tests, especially the standardized ones. I always second guess myself and I sweat like crazy because I am so nervous. I read and reread things numerous times because for some reason I am not retaining information because I am so nervous. I also didn't want to register for these tests because it is such a commitment. I hesitated when pressing the submit button because it was such a commitment, I was locked in. So weird.


Not sure if you remember back when I had to take a test for Family Video and I was so nervous, I was racing through things and I did not feel very good about the outcome, but I was wrong. I passed it, so maybe I am getting better at tests. We shall see, I have about a month and half to get prepared. I need to buy study material and put some real effort into this. Not my half-assed normal effort that I put into almost everything else in my life. But an extra dose of effort that is of someone else. Because I cannot afford to fail these things. I mean literally I cannot afford to fail them and then have to take them again. So fingers crossed.