Hopes for the New Year

So it is 2012 which means that it is a new year and I am looking forward to certain aspects of 2012.

First I am very excited for the Olympics. I always have them on the tele (being British) for the duration of the games. I love London (though I have never been there). Michael Phelps will return with his friend (I assume) Ryan Lockte who is so very attractive. Gymnastics is just amazing. The national pride is palpable. It is just great!

I am also turning 25, quarter of a century, which I am not looking forward to as much. I have 2 months until that looming day and I am not sure how I feel about it, or how I should feel about it. I am getting older which can have its advantages, but at the same time I am not someone who likes change or is okay with things never being the same again. 25 is a big number, not as big as 30, but still I am not longer in my early twenties I will be in my mid twenties. I still cannot believe that I am this old, I do not feel it.

I am hoping to have a full time teaching job and living on my own. Working under another teacher is nice, but there are times that I am second guessed or I do not do things as she would do them. I am ready to not have people questioning me. I know it will happen with administration, but hopefully not with my peers and also I hope that my work will speak for itself. fingers crossed this one comes true.

I want to visit some of my friends. I would like to make it to Colorado to visit a friend and also back to Washington and Canada to visit all my university friends. I miss my friends so much. And I really do miss Canada. It was a great place to live and the people were my favorite.

I want to follow my heart and passions. I have opportunities that pass by me that tug at my heart and I let them go. I do not want to be held back or feel as though I do not deserve it. I have a tendency to not give myself credit. I am quite amazing. I am worth it all, and I can have it all. Sometimes I might need to fight for it or find it.

I hope that 2012 leads me down paths that are different and maybe not foreseen, but worth the while. I do not want to merely go through this year as I did with others and live, but that I thrive. That life is not something to be taken for granted. I want to love 2012.

the new year.

I just realized it has been a little while since I posted. I will say I have been busy. Since the new year has started I have been asked what I am going to do next year. Am I going to apply for teacher jobs, am I going to stay here, or move. And once again I have the answer I don't know. I mean I sometimes wish that life could just stop for a minute for me to catch up. I thought that living at home would be relaxing, and it is don't get me wrong, but I thought I would have time to get ready for the next stage in my life and I cannot say that I have had a lot of time to think about it. Or maybe I have not been using the little time that I have to actually think about it.

I just do not know what I want to do and am kind of lazy. Is It okay to not know? but I don't think it is okay to be lazy. Welp we shall see.

One thing that I did do for the future was apply for Teach For America. I am really hoping that I could get this opportunity. I would love to be able to have my own classroom, live on my own, but almost like with training wheels, simply because I have a guaranteed job. Well hopefully I will know in a month or so.

Kids have been so rowdy this week, the first week back since break. One day, the same wardrobe, I was told I looked like a sailor, and a police officer. I was told I sounded like Justin Bieber. One boy said the B word, which just sent be over the edge. (he was not calling anyone one, he just said it). I laughed so hard, but then had to make sure that he knew it was not okay, he is 3. Crazy.

better world

So I was reading through Leviticus this morning and I know what you are thinking...why Leviticus? But I do have an answer for you. I sometimes roam the Bible for something to read, but now I have started from the beginning so I always have a place to start. Anyway back to my story. I was reading through Leviticus and I came across chapter 18 where it discusses Unlawful Sexual Relations.

God is telling the Israelites to not have sexual relations with their relatives. I was reminded of some of those crazy warning labels on products that make you say... "Really, we have to be warning people of that?" For example my mom bought a curling iron the other day and on the warning label it said do not use while in bed sleeping or something of the sort and my mom thought that was funny. I said that they probably had to put it on their because someone has done it before. It is not on there simply to be funny, but to inform people.

Now to tie it all together. I was thinking that back in Old Testament Bible times, the world must have been way worse back then than it is now. Because God would not warn us against something that did not seem to be an issue. He is going to use his time wisely and tell us of those dangers that are around us. This makes me think that it was the norm for people to have sexual relations with their relatives. Which then makes me believe that since that is not the norm today that the world was a little worse back then, not saying that we have 'arrived' or anything, but that that part is not as much of an issue as it was back then. I feel as though back then people did as they pleased, or what pleased them. I also find that this whole chapter is geared toward men. It has been said that they are the more sexual beings. I like how this chapter is wrapped up. God makes a statement that the land has been defiled by the people who did these things before the Israelites got there. If they cannot live their without defiling the land then the land will vomit then out as it did the nations before them. The land, God's land, will actually purge itself of the sinfulness. Interesting thought.

We still have many an issue and I am glad that sexual relations with our relatives is not on the forefront of them.

Just a little tidbit from my brain this morning.

Next stage...Life.

So I got the second job. I am officially an employee at Family Video. It was a whirlwind of an interviewing process, but I passed with what I would say was flying colors.

I realize that my life will not be as free as before. I will not have as much free time, but I will have a little more money.

Another thing that I figured out is I could have bought a house in my town, a nice one. For how much student loan debt I have acquired. A little sad, yes, devastating, no. I have a good peace about this debt that I have. I know that it will be paid off in as little time as I can allow for. I am hoping to have my student loans all paid off in less than 10 years. Do not quote me on that, well I did just put it in writing, but lets just say it is a goal, not a promise.

Now that I have a second income I will be able to at least have a little of spending money and extra money to pay off loans. I am feeling good about where I am heading into this next stage of my life...Let's call it repayment time or maybe reality, or adulthood, or making a lot of money that I will never actually be able to see. A little bitter, maybe.

Until then!

Second Job

So I am really entering the adult world. I am realizing that I will need more money and have now started looking for another job. I know big step. I was thinking that my student loans are going to be starting to roll in, or maybe shoot in like a bullet, and I want to not be wondering if I am going to be making ends meet. It will still be tight, but I do not need to have a crazy amount of money.

So knowing this, I began to search for a part-time job. I was hoping to find something that was a bit more self directed, such as personal shopping or personal styling. But I feel as though living in my small little town the need is not too great. Thus I am looking into a few different places.

I applied at CVS pharmacy, but did not get a call back. I also applied at Family Video, which surprisingly I have made it through 2 out of the three stages of interviewing so far. I met with the store manager, and had to take a test. I know what you are thinking "a test for a video store," but yes I had to take a test. It was actually quite difficult. There were 8 different sections, two were math and I did not even finish them in the time allotted. I had to alphabetize, find synonyms, reading comprehension. It was crazy. I thought I was in school again. I was so nervous I was shaking!!

But I passed. I did not think that I did.

So tomorrow I meet with the district manager. And after that I will find out if I have another job. Which will make me rest easy a bit more.

Kids are funny-I asked a girl where she has been (because she had been gone) another little boy said "At the junkyard." I laughed so hard. He was not being mean, I think he just said the first thing that came to mind! It was funny

dual-personality

I am becoming a grown-up. The signs are all there. I can tell that I am turning the corner.

I am not going out all that much, actually I only really go out on the weekends, because I am tired after work and I have TV to watch. I really do not feel like it. I find that I enjoy being at home, doing things on my own. So that when I do go out it is special, or maybe that is just what I tell myself so that I don't feel as though I am 24 going on 50.

I am becoming quite frugal with my money. I go out shopping a lot, but do not buy anything unless it is cheap, and I really like it. I really like fashion, but most things that are cheap are not worth having.

Sometimes I feel as though I should be a little more spontaneous and free flowey, seeing as though I am only 24, but I live in a town of 26,000. I mean there isn't really anything to do here. So maybe that is the reason that I do not go out.

I am quite pleased with my very low-maintenance, easy-going, carefree (sort of) life. But sometimes I feel as though I should be doing something more, that I should be out there living life on the wild side. I at times feel as though I have the fashionista, jet-setter, mindset or personality, but live in a small town with zero prospects! Funny how that works.

The kindies are for sure keeping me busy. Sometimes they are so funny. Cannot think of tidbits right now. but there will be some coming soon.

Loans!

So I have been living at home for almost five months. I will begin paying off my student loans in 2 months or so. I have acquired all of the paperwork for them and am quite shocked at how okay I am with it. Last summer I would worry, I mean it would keep me up at night, thinking about how in the world I was going to pay it back. I was very happy to see that my loan that has the most money on it has the least amount of interest.

I also am going to hopefully have a second job, I have an interview on Thursday. fingers crossed.

Worry is not something that I seem to be doing much of anymore. I am quite pleased. I have always been a very big worrier, so it is nice to have a break.

By the way that co-worker who was very rude to me did apologize the next day, which was very nice.