Worry/the future

I was contacted a couple of days ago by a friend that I have known for a few years now. He read my blog and emailed me a question that I have been thinking about for a while now. He related to the idea of risks that I had talked about in my blog and asked if I was really taking a risk next year (well a little more tactfully then that). It was nice to have someone pretty much call me out on it. I had to think about it.

Before when I was deciding on staying home, it had a little bit to do with running from risk. But now I can say that this next year is about me being prepared for the next risk that life has for me. I have been taking risks for the past 6 years and am ready to be in a place where I can safely take risks (kind of an oxymoron). I can focus on some of the avenues that I think God has been preparing me for. I use to wonder why I had the childhood I had, but now I know it is to talk with other girls with similar backgrounds. That is what I hope to do this summer and next year. oh yeah and I plan to teach.

I have been reminded lately of how much money and worry can control you. If I have something on my mind I cannot get to sleep, I can lose my appetite, and actually start to feel sick, all because I am concerned about something that I have no control over. It is really crazy how our lives can be altered so much because of how much we fear the unknown. Worry will control you because you feel as though you are not in control. (which really we are not in control ever). My mother told me the other day when I was allowing worry to take over, "that money is just money. Everything will work out and at the end of the day, money is just money." It was nice to have that reminder. She always knows how to defuse me and always has exactly the right words. I do not know how she does it, but she has talked me down from many an uprising. I love her so, and this is quite appropriate, seeing as it was mother's day yesterday. I have truly been blessed.

the last few days

So I have started my 2 week course on teaching social studies. It is for 3 1/2 hours 4 nights a week. It hasn't actually been that bad. Time does seem to fly.

I found a few new blogs that I quite enjoy about teaching.

http://twowritingteachers.wordpress.com/quotations/

http://blog.mrmeyer.com/

So I had to find a quite a few weeks ago that I wanted to use during my education graduation ceremony. Let me tell you it took a long time to find one, and I just needed to finally pick one. It was quite anticlimactic at the ceremony, people were walking in front of it and you couldn't even read it but the quote I chose was a quote from Mark Twain. I found that I loved his quotes.

“20 years from now you will be disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the one’s you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover” ~ Mark Twain.

I found this to be quite true and I hoped when I chose this quote that my life would be marked by catching the wind in my sails and not always playing it safe.

here are some other Mark Twain quotes.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

All generalizations are false, including this one.

All right, then, I'll go to hell.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Read more:http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/m/mark_twain.html#ixzz1LRzsFAR4

Graduation

So graduation has come and gone. It was quite bittersweet, because yes I am done (but I still have 2 weeks of classes) and also in two weeks I will be leaving somewhere that I am not sure I will be coming back to. I have lived here for 5 years of my life and I found myself thinking yesterday, that I did not want to leave. It is gorgeous out here and I am not simply meaning the landscape because it is pretty but it pales in comparison to the people that I have had the privelege of knowing here.

There are some friends that I have known for years. My roommate from my first and second year and I live with her now as well. I know that we will continue to be friends even if we do not talk a lot. We have this way of making up for lost time very quickly. But there are friends that I have just become close with this year and I am very sad to have to cut these friendships short. I know I do not actually have to do that, but I am terrible at keeping in touch. I know some of my roommates have created a blog to keep in contact with eachother. Maybe I will do the same.

Life

it never stops...just when you want to cherish the moment it reminds you that it is never through. Endings are inevitable, beginnings are just around the corner. and I cannot do a thing about it. Sometimes I want to stop it all, crawl into a comfortable postion and let life happen. But I cannot, Life also reminds you to keep living it.

I will miss this place, I have 2 weeks left to enjoy it, take it all in and before you or I know it. This stage of my life will be over and the next one is quite foggy at best.

Faith

Its what I need for the next journey, because it is what got me through this one.

Until then...

Hello-Goodbye!

I am done with my electronic portfolio. I never thought that I would finish that thing. I feel quite exhilarated. It is so nice to be done.

Which brings me to the hard part of this year. I am terrible at goodbyes. It started when I had to leave home after high school. I was going to Ecuador to attend Bible school. It was hard for me to leave. But when I left Ecuador it was even harder, because I knew that we all would never be there again. It would never be the same. it actually brings me to tears thinking about it now. I lived with these people for 8-9 months, we couldn't go home like people can at university. It broke my heart that I would not be close with these people. This separation almost feels as though you have to leave apart of yourself there. You have to strip apart of yourself off and lay it down because if you carry it with you and hold it close you can never be present.

I am still friends with people from Ecuador, but I find that when we get together we are still as close as ever.

Movie critiques to come-

The Lincoln Lawyer

Summer in Genoa

Waiting for Superman!

Oh the to-do list!

Well I did finish all that I wanted to finish yesterday, well actually I just finished them about 2 minutes ago. So I really did not finish all of the numbers on my todo list yesterday. This weekend is a packed weekend.

Today I am going for a walk with a friend, then going into Vancouver with a couple other friends.

It should be fun, I hope we do not spend a lot of money, because I do not really have much to be spending. That is the life of a college student, even a college grad. I am bombarded with opportunities to spend money and it is hard for me to turn them down all of the time. Usually those opportunities have to do with food, which is terrible because that is only satisfying for that moment. But I do love food. When I had a cold almost a month ago, I could not taste anything for over a week and that was a depressing week, also because I was really really sick.

Applications-what am I going to do?

So I have no idea what I am going to be next year. I just went to an information meeting about applying to the Abbotsford School District and I do not know what I am doing. I am so lazy. I have not really sent in one application yet. It is really hard for me to apply for certain things, because I have so much to do right now. I need to buckle down and do it.

I am slightly overwhelmed, so many things that I need to do. When this happens I can get quite complacent and just not do any of it. I need to make a list today, I will write it on here and check my status later.

1. send reference letters to character reference for BCCT

2. print out application to Calgary School District

3. fill out application

4. print out application to Langley School District

5. Fill out application

6. complete e-portfolio

7. go into my school

8. finish marking

9. have grads finalized

10. get my hair done

See how that can be overwhelming to even start. Some things may seem easy but there is always a second step to them.

I need to get 1,2,4,7,8,9,10 done today. It would be nice to get it all done today. but I am not superman!

well until then...

Reflection/ Mona Lisa

So today is my first day being done with student teaching. I have the whole week off and I am already missing my class. I am also slightly bored. This past semester has been amazing. I could not have asked for a better SA. I switched schools and SAs from last semester.

She has taught me so much about teaching. If you talk to students kindly and trust them they want to meet your expectations, but when you are always down on them they begin to feel as though they could never do anything right.

Above are a few pictures of projects that I did with my kids over the past semester.This first one is a Mona Lisa Collage. I had a picture of the Mona Lisa already cut up into 25 pieces and then I talked to them about Leonardo Da Vinci and the Mona Lisa, its history. Then students received a piece of paper and a picture. I let them swap if they wanted to. Then they duplicated that picture onto their bigger page. It turned out amazing. I also made sure to give the hands and face to people in my class that were more artistically inclined. Whenever someone walked into my classroom they always commented on it.